I had just arrived at the pick up area when one of the moms from Makena's class greeted me and introduced me to the person she was talking with. This mom always does this--it's such a thoughtful thing to do!! She explained that we are new and told the other mom how well Makena is doing. Then she said that Makena has been participating a lot more in class. Then her face lit up as she said to me, "Oh, I forgot to tell you! Madeline (her daughter) was telling me the other day that Makena said, "Bonjourno a tutti" in Italian class last week." Apparently, each week in class the teacher has the students take turns coming to the front of the class to say, "Hello everyone!" in Italian. Makena has been too shy to do it, that is until last week! Madeline was sooo excited for Makena; she couldn't wait to tell her mom. She said everyone in class started clapping when she did it.
And there I stood, tearing up at the thought of my brave little girl and all her wonderful friends.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Monday, August 16, 2010
Makena
I've only really glazed over Makena's leap into the big girl realm. I would be remiss if I didn't give some more details which have been both heart wrenching and heart warming. It's quite timely given that all of her classmates just started kindergarten this week.
Makena turned 5 on April 27th. The cut off to startkindergarten prep is April 30th. In addition, the school year started in February here, so by the time Makena started they were almost exactly halfway through the year (less 2 days). So, she's one of the youngest, if not the youngest and she's half a year behind. It was quite difficult to decide what to do. If we waited to start her in prep next year she'd actually end up 18 months behind if we ever moved back to the U.S. Also, if she didn't go to prep she'd have to spend another year in pre-school kinder. Combined for her and Kessler, the cost would be around $3500 per month. Yes, really! Another drawback is she'd go to kinder for a year then switch schools again. That just seemed like too much change.
So, we decided to send her to prep. Worst case, if she didn't catch up we'd hold her back a year. Next year she'd be ahead of the game rather than just starting.
The zoning for the schools here isn't always enforced. We have the option to go to pretty much any school. There are probably 5 that are near our house (within 3 miles). There's one school that does enforce their zone--and we are in that zone. We heard a lot of great things about the school, but we heard a lot of great things about all the schools. We checked that one out and liked it. On a side note, that's when I had to bite the bullet and drive. We checked the school out in the morning then Mark had to go to work. The receptionist asked if I could get the paperwork back to her that day so Makena could start the next day, a Wednesday. So, for the first time ever, I sat myself on the right side of the car--behind the steering wheel and drove Mark to the train station as I pleaded with the kids to be quiet so I could think.
When I got home I started to fill out the paperwork. I came across one labeled "Christian Religious Education". The sheet had a long explanation about the importance of values. At the bottom we had the choice to agree to the 30 minute a week class, a Judaism or Greek Orthodox equivalent or opt out altogether. There was no explanation for the other 3 options--just the Christian option. Along with the clear implication that your child will lack values if they don't participate in the Christian program. The tone was very much dismissive of other religions but in a very underhanded way. Coming from a school system where there's clear separation of church and state I was taken aback by this. Over the course of my life I have come to believe that religion is a very personal decision, especially the interpretation of religion. My preference would be for both me and the kids to receive a religion education that delves into all the major religions--not just one. And that is fact/theory based rather than faith based. After speaking with Mark, we opted out.
I drove the packet back to the school--stressed as hell from having completed my 2nd driving adventure. A few minutes after turning in the packet the receptionist came up to me and said, you marked "opt out" for CRE. I said, "yes." She said, "I just want to make sure you know, Makena will be taken out of the class while the remainder of the class stays for the CRE. Do you want to reconsider? It really is a lovely program." Again, I was floored. I asked if could sit in one of the classes; she told me I could not. But, she could provide some literature. All I could think about is Makena being escorted out of the class while the other students sneered at her--pelting the heathen with wads of paper. I didn't feel any better about any of it given the the receptionist's response. So, feeling in-over-my-head, I deferred the issue Mark. He called the school and spoke with the principal. He arranged a meeting with the CRE teacher. I felt so unsettled by all of this I couldn't send Makena to school the next day. I looked into other schools but found this is a Victoria policy, not an individual school policy. So, we went to school and met the CRE teacher. She showed us the material that would be covered and while it was pretty innocuous we still felt like it just wasn't appropriate. We decided to stick with our original plan.
I felt better after making the decision. I felt even better after seeing how the kids treated Makena. She really is a little rock star. Kids will run up to her and nearly knock her over trying to give her a hug. Though, one day I did hear one kid singing, "William and Makena sitting in a tree...." and William (I assume) was shaking his head back and forth abruptly--trying to get the other kid to shut up. I left not really knowing how to feel about it--except worry for my little baby. She has no idea what this means--she didn't even hear it though she was standing right next to me. Hell, I'm not sure I know what it means. But, I know I'm not ready for it!!
Besides that little incident, all things were great for Makena at Brighton Primary. Me though, well I felt totally disconnected. I just wanted to go sit in class so I could know what's going on. There was no orientation so we were flying blind. I hate being unprepared and playing catch up. Things like the uniform stressed me out. The last time I dealt with a uniform was when I was in the military--and that was no joke. Ironing each night for an hour, shining boots. I still remember the uniform regulation that we had to adhere to, 34-10. "Airman, you better check your 34-10!" I don't remember my own birthday most years, but I can remember that reg--so that will give you a sense as to why my little 5 year old's uniform requirements were a bit daunting to me. And why I nearly lost my mind when Mark dressed in jeans one day. "She'll wear dirty pants before she wears jeans!!!" I said, still half asleep running from room to room in a panic--trying to remember where the washing machine was because near it would be the dirty clothes hamper.
(That was just a few weeks ago. At the time, I would stay up until about 4:00 a.m. trading then I'd sleep until 7:45 a.m. I'd get up in a dazed state and drive Mark to the train station and the kids to school. Then I'd come back home and sleep from about 10:00 until 2:00--at least I'd try. I was never sure which duties I was waking up to--pick up, drop off.. but there was always panic. That didn't work out so well as evidenced by my "she'll wear dirty pants...." tirade.)
Back to Makena.. we started to learn the ropes. Among Makena's routines are a "reader" every night. It's just a small easy book that Makena reads to us. Now, Makena has never "read" to us. We've always read to her. We were starting to fret--I mean, don't they learn how to read before they start reading? Well, no. Mark sat down with Makena and she read the book from cover to cover. She sounded out words and looked at pictures to figure out the context.. and she read it. It was amazing to see. Now she does it night after night and we are still amazed. In addition, she has "The Magic 100 Words" that she needs to learn. It was a week or two before we realized these existed. Most of the kids are onto the 4th or 5th set of the 100 words. Makena is now on her 3rd set, ready for her 4th. Miss Greenslade said that most kids take several weeks to get past the first set. So, Makena is doing really well. Jeez, I start to smile as I replay her little voice, "if, on, the, they..." Such a beautiful girl.
Incidentally, I started this post over a week ago. On Wednesday of last week I found a worksheet in Makena's school papers titled, "Thank you, God, for colors." (Ironic that color is spelled the American way.) I sent her teacher an email. Apparently she didn't get the "opt out" notice. She apologized profusely and promised to make sure that Makena didn't attend the session that day.
When I picked Makena up from school, I asked her if she was taken out of the class. She said yes, along with two of her classmates. I guess she got to play on the computer. I've since had conversations with a few of the class parents. The difference between the States and Australia is quite fascinating--but I'll save that for another post.
Much more importantly, everyday when I pick her up from school--she comes bouncing out, scanning all the mommy/daddy faces until she sees mine. Then she beams this cheeky little grin as she schleps to me, with the lean that comes with lugging a backpack that's half your size. She grabs my hand and we walk to the gate and across the crosswalk. She always asks me where I parked and gives me grief when I tell her it's far--creating memories I'll never forget.
Makena turned 5 on April 27th. The cut off to start
So, we decided to send her to prep. Worst case, if she didn't catch up we'd hold her back a year. Next year she'd be ahead of the game rather than just starting.
The zoning for the schools here isn't always enforced. We have the option to go to pretty much any school. There are probably 5 that are near our house (within 3 miles). There's one school that does enforce their zone--and we are in that zone. We heard a lot of great things about the school, but we heard a lot of great things about all the schools. We checked that one out and liked it. On a side note, that's when I had to bite the bullet and drive. We checked the school out in the morning then Mark had to go to work. The receptionist asked if I could get the paperwork back to her that day so Makena could start the next day, a Wednesday. So, for the first time ever, I sat myself on the right side of the car--behind the steering wheel and drove Mark to the train station as I pleaded with the kids to be quiet so I could think.
When I got home I started to fill out the paperwork. I came across one labeled "Christian Religious Education". The sheet had a long explanation about the importance of values. At the bottom we had the choice to agree to the 30 minute a week class, a Judaism or Greek Orthodox equivalent or opt out altogether. There was no explanation for the other 3 options--just the Christian option. Along with the clear implication that your child will lack values if they don't participate in the Christian program. The tone was very much dismissive of other religions but in a very underhanded way. Coming from a school system where there's clear separation of church and state I was taken aback by this. Over the course of my life I have come to believe that religion is a very personal decision, especially the interpretation of religion. My preference would be for both me and the kids to receive a religion education that delves into all the major religions--not just one. And that is fact/theory based rather than faith based. After speaking with Mark, we opted out.
I drove the packet back to the school--stressed as hell from having completed my 2nd driving adventure. A few minutes after turning in the packet the receptionist came up to me and said, you marked "opt out" for CRE. I said, "yes." She said, "I just want to make sure you know, Makena will be taken out of the class while the remainder of the class stays for the CRE. Do you want to reconsider? It really is a lovely program." Again, I was floored. I asked if could sit in one of the classes; she told me I could not. But, she could provide some literature. All I could think about is Makena being escorted out of the class while the other students sneered at her--pelting the heathen with wads of paper. I didn't feel any better about any of it given the the receptionist's response. So, feeling in-over-my-head, I deferred the issue Mark. He called the school and spoke with the principal. He arranged a meeting with the CRE teacher. I felt so unsettled by all of this I couldn't send Makena to school the next day. I looked into other schools but found this is a Victoria policy, not an individual school policy. So, we went to school and met the CRE teacher. She showed us the material that would be covered and while it was pretty innocuous we still felt like it just wasn't appropriate. We decided to stick with our original plan.
I felt better after making the decision. I felt even better after seeing how the kids treated Makena. She really is a little rock star. Kids will run up to her and nearly knock her over trying to give her a hug. Though, one day I did hear one kid singing, "William and Makena sitting in a tree...." and William (I assume) was shaking his head back and forth abruptly--trying to get the other kid to shut up. I left not really knowing how to feel about it--except worry for my little baby. She has no idea what this means--she didn't even hear it though she was standing right next to me. Hell, I'm not sure I know what it means. But, I know I'm not ready for it!!
Besides that little incident, all things were great for Makena at Brighton Primary. Me though, well I felt totally disconnected. I just wanted to go sit in class so I could know what's going on. There was no orientation so we were flying blind. I hate being unprepared and playing catch up. Things like the uniform stressed me out. The last time I dealt with a uniform was when I was in the military--and that was no joke. Ironing each night for an hour, shining boots. I still remember the uniform regulation that we had to adhere to, 34-10. "Airman, you better check your 34-10!" I don't remember my own birthday most years, but I can remember that reg--so that will give you a sense as to why my little 5 year old's uniform requirements were a bit daunting to me. And why I nearly lost my mind when Mark dressed in jeans one day. "She'll wear dirty pants before she wears jeans!!!" I said, still half asleep running from room to room in a panic--trying to remember where the washing machine was because near it would be the dirty clothes hamper.
(That was just a few weeks ago. At the time, I would stay up until about 4:00 a.m. trading then I'd sleep until 7:45 a.m. I'd get up in a dazed state and drive Mark to the train station and the kids to school. Then I'd come back home and sleep from about 10:00 until 2:00--at least I'd try. I was never sure which duties I was waking up to--pick up, drop off.. but there was always panic. That didn't work out so well as evidenced by my "she'll wear dirty pants...." tirade.)
Back to Makena.. we started to learn the ropes. Among Makena's routines are a "reader" every night. It's just a small easy book that Makena reads to us. Now, Makena has never "read" to us. We've always read to her. We were starting to fret--I mean, don't they learn how to read before they start reading? Well, no. Mark sat down with Makena and she read the book from cover to cover. She sounded out words and looked at pictures to figure out the context.. and she read it. It was amazing to see. Now she does it night after night and we are still amazed. In addition, she has "The Magic 100 Words" that she needs to learn. It was a week or two before we realized these existed. Most of the kids are onto the 4th or 5th set of the 100 words. Makena is now on her 3rd set, ready for her 4th. Miss Greenslade said that most kids take several weeks to get past the first set. So, Makena is doing really well. Jeez, I start to smile as I replay her little voice, "if, on, the, they..." Such a beautiful girl.
Incidentally, I started this post over a week ago. On Wednesday of last week I found a worksheet in Makena's school papers titled, "Thank you, God, for colors." (Ironic that color is spelled the American way.) I sent her teacher an email. Apparently she didn't get the "opt out" notice. She apologized profusely and promised to make sure that Makena didn't attend the session that day.
When I picked Makena up from school, I asked her if she was taken out of the class. She said yes, along with two of her classmates. I guess she got to play on the computer. I've since had conversations with a few of the class parents. The difference between the States and Australia is quite fascinating--but I'll save that for another post.
Much more importantly, everyday when I pick her up from school--she comes bouncing out, scanning all the mommy/daddy faces until she sees mine. Then she beams this cheeky little grin as she schleps to me, with the lean that comes with lugging a backpack that's half your size. She grabs my hand and we walk to the gate and across the crosswalk. She always asks me where I parked and gives me grief when I tell her it's far--creating memories I'll never forget.
Friday, August 13, 2010
76 Days
It's been 76 days since we arrived in Melbourne. I knew when we made the decision to do this that it would be hard. I haven't had a hard life by any stretch, but I have made a lot of hard decisions, like joining the military, moving across country and back and across again, changing careers.. having kids. So, I know that hard really means nothing without context. And, you have no context until you've had the experience. Now I know what hard is in the context of uprooting your family, your young family, and moving them halfway around the world and doing it in less than 5 weeks. Yep, it's hard.
It begins with utter exhaustion from your own jet lag, which is not the same as each of your child's jet lag which is not the same as your husband's jet lag. Then, there's the emotional and physical drain from everyone getting sick in parallel or taking turns, taking many turns. And then the worrying about how you'll take care of your basic needs like getting food when you have no car or finding a permanent place to live when you haven't a clue about... well, about anything. Then there are all of the decisions. Being decisive has never been one of my strong points. I'm tortured with practice around every corner. And, you must educate yourself before you can make a decision. Like--what's a "cap" for yourcell mobile phone service? How much bandwidth do we need from our internet service provider? Which neighborhood, which school, which car? Of course, there's the driving--accepting that the wrong side of the road is now the right side. Resistance is futile, to say the least. You must cope with all of this hard with the constant madness of the dangling loose ends back in your former home. And then there's the mourning of all that you took for granted, like your friends and family, having two cars, your husband's flexible work schedule, having to only worry about one time zone in which to get things done.
The hardest of the hard is done now though. Makena and Kessler are in wonderful schools. Makena is treated like a celebrity, both because she's the new kid and because she's so small relative to the rest. They love looking after her. When we're walking across campus kids of all ages are saying, "Hi Makena!". At first she ignored them--assuming they couldn't be talking to her because she didn't know their names. Now she soaks it up--running off to play when a friend greets her at drop off, never looking back at her proud mommy. I feel a little cheated that I didn't get the full run up to her first day ofkindergarten prep--but I'm so happy to see her happy.
Kessler loves his school as well. Apparently he's a hit with the little ladies in his class. He and some of his friends will end up in a fit of laughter that's contagious. His teacher says they laugh so hard they can't breathe. Kessler has the sweetest belly laugh. I can just picture him there giggling with his friends; it brings tears to my eyes.
It's amazing how much better things are when you know your kids are good.
It begins with utter exhaustion from your own jet lag, which is not the same as each of your child's jet lag which is not the same as your husband's jet lag. Then, there's the emotional and physical drain from everyone getting sick in parallel or taking turns, taking many turns. And then the worrying about how you'll take care of your basic needs like getting food when you have no car or finding a permanent place to live when you haven't a clue about... well, about anything. Then there are all of the decisions. Being decisive has never been one of my strong points. I'm tortured with practice around every corner. And, you must educate yourself before you can make a decision. Like--what's a "cap" for your
The hardest of the hard is done now though. Makena and Kessler are in wonderful schools. Makena is treated like a celebrity, both because she's the new kid and because she's so small relative to the rest. They love looking after her. When we're walking across campus kids of all ages are saying, "Hi Makena!". At first she ignored them--assuming they couldn't be talking to her because she didn't know their names. Now she soaks it up--running off to play when a friend greets her at drop off, never looking back at her proud mommy. I feel a little cheated that I didn't get the full run up to her first day of
Kessler loves his school as well. Apparently he's a hit with the little ladies in his class. He and some of his friends will end up in a fit of laughter that's contagious. His teacher says they laugh so hard they can't breathe. Kessler has the sweetest belly laugh. I can just picture him there giggling with his friends; it brings tears to my eyes.
It's amazing how much better things are when you know your kids are good.
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